The Wellness Recovery plan A.K.A A busy mom’s guide to self-care during the fourth trimester. Everything you need to feel beautiful and human! (By someone who is truly terrible at fitting in self-care.)
I recently had my second child. The first time, I was fighting to get back to “normal” asap. This time, I realised I needed to just enjoy this time and was determined to take it slow during my fourth trimester. (The joke was on me mind you, but God loves a tryer.)
I was planning a wellness recovery plan that was all about skincare and smoothies. It didn’t work out that way in the slightest.
For starters, I forgot I already had one child and that child would be awake at the crack of dawn and also need me physically, emotionally, and, apparently… spiritually, available.
Secondly, I forgot, someone needs to do the laundry still…
Oh, and I run my own tech consultancy…so there is that.
In short, I didn’t quite manage to nail a “fourth trimester retreat”. However, I did still manage to put some things in place to try and take care of myself between all the madness. It wasn’t glamorous, it wasn’t even leisurely, but it was there!
For those wondering “what is the fourth trimester?” – it’s those first three months post-birth when you’re basically hibernating with your tiny human. And if you’re counting, yes, that makes it four trimesters total (how many trimesters for pregnancy? 3 of course, plus this bonus round – surprise!).
Disclaimer: Always consult your healthcare provider before starting any postpartum wellness recovery plan, particularly regarding belly binding, massage, and skincare products. This guide is based on personal experience and research but isn’t medical advice.
The Strategic Pre-Baby Prep: Your Wellness Recovery Plan Timeline
With my first daughter, I was caught off guard by the reality of postpartum life. There was no wellness recovery plan. There was no plan point blank. I’d gone from someone who was put together (and I’m talking, someone who had time to do their hair and make-up every day – I worked in banking) to someone who was struggling to get a shower.
Then there was the postpartum anxiety; the constant googling and research to figure out how this small human worked. (For anyone in this position, the anxiety does go away.)
Needless to say, I did not put in place a wellness recovery plan. I didn’t realise basic things were about to become a struggle and I didn’t realise how that would impact me mentally.
The second time around, I had learnt some life lessons. Mostly, the lesson was not to try and “bounce back” and, rather, accept the fourth trimester as time to take it slow.
So, I started planning in advance. You can try my approach and start thinking how to take care of yourself postpartum when you’re about 7 months into the gig. I’ve laid out what I did below.
Despite this, apparent wisdom, I completely failed to slow down (that was very much part of the plan). Life doesn’t slow down when you want it to. Still, I knew a fourth trimester postnatal retreat was still needed – it was just busier than I expected and involved more emails.
So, here is how I prepped for my fourth-trimester pregnancy, everything I did for beauty and skincare, nutrition, and mental down-time!
How To Prepare To Glow Up, Relax, & Have A Laugh During Your Fourth Trimester
7-8 Months Pregnant:
1. Declutter your bathroom and clothing cabinets (trust me, you don’t want to be hunting for pyjamas and face wash at 3am
I love a good declutter, so I found it cathartic to throw out all my old face creams, ragged t-shirts and anything else I was hoarding.
In a period where everything is chaotic, (and I knew I would be half-sleepwalking,) I wanted to simplify. I decluttered and threw out all of my old beauty products (yes that anti-wrinkle cream from 2018 has definitely expired, my friend) and gave away clothing I no longer needed. Then I stocked it up with all my new delicious essentials (don’t worry – full shopping list is below of what I bought.)
A simple tidy setting for your skin routine and clothing takes away one element of chaos and makes a huge difference. Your post-pregnancy self will thank you.
2. Research and book your postpartum massage specialist
Post-pregnancy massage is fantastic for reducing inflammation, supporting circulation, relaxing your body from all the strain of birthing and feeding and helps support your recovery.
In the south-Asian culture, mothers and babies are massaged daily for this reason. That’s right, DAILY! My Indian mother-in-law speaks fondly about daily massages after giving birth. “The body needs it” she tells me.
I can only dream of entering a post-partum spa period like that. Still, we can schedule a massage in to look forward to.
You will typically have to wait around 4-6 weeks before you can have a massage. I didn’t want to deal with figuring out who to go to when I had a newborn – I knew finding the time to slip away would be hard enough.
I’d highly recommend researching and getting recommendations on a good post-pregnancy massage specialist. A simple Google search could be all you need, it’s also worth checking at your local beauty salons and spas if they provide this service.
If you plan it, you’re more likely to do it when you’re on a busy schedule.
And yes, I have snuck in a cheeky spa day to this wellness recovery plan. It’s for health purposes!
3. Make your TV show and book short-list
I wish I had done this the first time round and maxed out on hilarious things to watch and read during long breastfeeding sessions.
The second time around, I can’t say I have remotely had the time to get through my list BUT, lightered reads and TV shows still really helped me have a little bit of downtime even if it was a 30-minutes at the end of the hectic day. I personally, found the books kept me going through night feeds too and I started to look a little forward to them!
If you’re looking for inspiration, here is my list.
TV Shows
- Modern Family (somehow funnier when you have kids)
- The Office
- Parks and Recreation
- Ted Lasso
- Running Point – I just love Kate Hudson
- Derry Girls
Book
- This is Going To Hurt by Adam Kay (The TV adaptation doesn’t do this book justice, it’s a lot funnier)
- Dear Girls by Ali Wong
- Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman
- Lessons in Chemistry by Bonnie Garmus
- The Baby Is Not the Issue by Ross McCammon
- Good Behaviour Molly Keane
Mentally, down time to escape from the daily grind, and what feels like lock-down during the first few months, was a life saver for me. If you don’t do anything else on this wellness recovery plan, pick some great TV shows and books!
4. Buy a postpartum belly wrap
I had every intention of belly-binding the second time around. I tried it a few times but in the rush of everything, I ended up not doing it because I opted for the traditional approach and it felt like too much effort. I wish I’d bought a simple zip-up one!
Belly binding hasn’t been proven to help with postpartum recovery. However, it has been traditionally practised in South Asian countries. My mum-in-law mentioned it to me which is why I really wanted to try it this time. The idea is it holds the muscles in place as they join back together.
You can go with the traditional approach which simply requires a long wide cloth which is approximately 6-8m long. Alternatively, there are plenty of commercial options which are faster to snap on such as:
- Belly Bandit (adjustable, breathable)
- Bellefit Corset (structured support)
- Bengkung Belly Bind (can be used for the traditional approach – more on how to belly bind below)
8-9 Months Pregnant:
1. Stock up on your postpartum beauty and skincare arsenal
I wanted to feel like I was taking care of myself and emerge like a butterfly after my fourth trimester, so I decided to put together a postpartum kit for mom.
If nothing else, I’d smell really good.
I started off super ambitious with my skincare goals, but it didn’t happen. Of course, it didn’t happen! So here is what I actually bought and used.
Fourth Trimester Skin Care Products
Gentle Cleanser: La Roche Posay Toleriane Hydrating Cleanser (fragrance-free heaven)
Hydrating Toner: Goodal Green Tangerine Vita C Toner (for brightening and hydrating)
Serum: The Ordinary Alpha Arbutin 2% + HA (for even skin tone)
Eye Cream: Kleem Organics Firming eye gel (brightens and reduces puffiness)
Facial Moisturizer: Argon Oil (natural and effective)
Gentle Body Scrub: Tree Hut Moroccan Rose Sugar Scrub (budget-friendly but feels luxe)
Remember to avoid any areas still healing.
Stretch-Mark Prevention & Reduction Moisturizers: Bio-Oil Skincare Oil (the OG stretch mark oil)
Body Moisturizer: I use my homemade oil for this
It absorbs better if you apply your oil right after showering, while your skin is still damp
2. Invest in your new mom wardrobe
Remember when you decluttered your clothing – it was only to make room for new stuff. WAYHAY!
Here is a list of the items I made sure I had in my cupboard so I could be comfortable during my fourth trimester while still feeling put together (matching matters).
- 3-4 matching lounge sets: co-ords = instant put-together feeling. You can pop out in this with a good pair of trainers and an oversized coat but also fall asleep in them. Win.
- 2 luxurious PJ sets (because feeling luxurious matters): They can be silk, they can be lace, they can be bright pink and trimmed with feathers – you do you.
- 1 beautiful robe (feel fabulous and answer the door without scaring the delivery person)
- 1 pair of fluffy slippers
- 2 pairs of comfy slip-on shoes
- 1 good oversized coat
3. Gather your hair and make-up essentials
Here are a few low-maintenance glow up tips for the days you feel like living your best “glowing new-mom” life. You might decide to pop out for a coffee with friends or have family come round to visit. Perhaps a park walk! Either way, you want to capture some of those first pics and you deserve to show up as your best self even when you are exhausted. These are the essential glow up products I used for those moments (and still use) – it was nothing extensive, but seemed to shock everyone with how not new mom I looked.
5-Minute Face:
- Concealer (fake being awake until you actually are
- Cream blush (one-finger application)
- Tinted lip balm (to look alive)
Hair:
- Pack of Hair bobbles/ties
- Hair stylist – styling and drying in one.
I have thick long hair and I use this hair dryer for my hair. It takes approximately 15-20 mins for me to dry if I come directly out of the shower. It takes 5 -10 mins if I allow it to air dry while I get on with my morning and simply blow dry at the end. It is drying and styling in one!
Last Few Weeks:
This time around, I made sure I did all beauty maintenance appointments before having baby no.2 because good eyebrows make me feel put together.
- Here is a list of my beauty maintenance appointments.
- Waxing
- Eyebrows
- Get your hair done: A good haircut and/or colour, and a deep conditioning and blow dry will go a long way when you have no time to style your hair.
- Nails: Mani and Pedi. I personally like to wait until after the birth to get these done as a treat.
Another good one that some of my friends have done is lash extensions. It can make you look mascara-ready without any effort.
It’s always nice to wake up beautiful.
Here is your checklist:
- Fourth-trimester wardrobe stocked
- Postpartum massage appointment booked
- Belly binder in your drawer ready to use
- Skin-care caddy stocked and at the ready (don’t forget the cleansing pads)
First-Time Mom Gift
I remember when I had my daughter I realised how you can feel forgotten by absolutely everyone as soon as you give birth. While you love every minute of the love and attention your baby gets, it can be an extremely difficult time to feel seen when you are also recovering and need support.
I am kicking myself now for not having better new mom gift ideas to show them I still saw them for the amazing women they were. So, if you would like to show some love to your mommy friends, putting together a little customized hamper as a first time mom gift is a great thing you can do.
Here is my new mom gift idea with everything you need to say “I see you mama” in a personalized way.
The Ultimate New Mother Gift Set:
I have put this gift together for friends like a hamper but you could easily create your own new mom gift boxes. Here is what I’ve used in my hampers.
- Slippers (The fluffier the better I say)
- Burts Bees Lips Mask
- BYOMA Brightening Serum
- Kleem Organics Firming eye gel
- Doia Origin Rosehip and Grapefruit Face Cream
- Tree Hut Moroccan Rose Sugar Scrub
- Creme Mains – Almond and Milk Hand Cream
- Body Loofah
- Cooling Eye Mask
Gift Hamper Basket (to create your own new mother gift set)